Sunday, 16 March 2014

My little Girl

So a new year has arrived.  It is amazing how quickly things can change and how quickly time goes by.  It's as if I am a sail boat being led by the currents of time.  I look back on 2013 and see that I am a very different person now.  The birth of my daughter changed the way I look at things.

My daughter was born a year ago.

There was no doubt that the baby was coming.  My excitement was high.  My wife's best friend was bringing pizza over to the house so we could wait out her contractions.  Now I had pizza to keep my mind, at least a little preoccupied during the birth of my daughter.  My  wife was already in the bath tub trying to keep the pain from the contractions at bay.

I had just downloaded a contraction app so that we can monitor the contractions.  My wife was getting annoyed as I was more interested in the app than her swimming in the tub.  It took only a couple of hours before we had the go ahead from the mid-wife to head to the birthing centre.

It was a very cold night in January.  The EDM mix my friend had made me was pumping in the smart car and kept time of my wife's contractions.  The trip to the birthing centre was short lived we were the redirected by our mid-wife due to meconium in the fluid after breaking my wife's water.  Scared was an understatement.  My wife was howling like a wolf from pain and yet I had to keep calm.  Meconium meant that the baby was in distress.  We headed to the hospital as fast as my little 89 HP motor could take us safely.

Bitter cold nipped at my cheeks as we reached the hospital.  I got out grabbing everything I could carry.  The pain of the contractions made it difficult for my wife to walk.  I noticed my pace had quickened.  Leaving behind the reason why I was at the hospital in the first place.  I noticed i was walking alone.  I stopped and turned to run back to my wife.  Was this really happening?  Mind and body were trying to get equilibrium.  Heaven knows what she was going through.  Pizza was on my mind too, no word of lie in that. After what seemed like a hike up a mountain, we were in the delivery room.

We were still wanting to have a water birth.  The water was drawn in the tub.  The pain more excruciating than ever.  Low notes emanated from my wife while I took a moment to shove a pizza slice into my mouth.  My wife's best friend was more  level headed than I was.  The mid-wife recruited her to help my wife get settled.  Baby was being monitored and there were fluctuations in the baby's every ten minutes.

The pain was too much for my wife and had to have an epidural started. I propped her up while the anesthesiologist worked.  Baby's vitals were not getting any better.  Before we knew it I was signing off waiver forms and releases.  It was a whirlwind.  I was being dressed in a gown and hair net.  We were going into surgery.  An emergency caesarean section had to be done.

I was brought into the waiting room.  I could see the doctors  prepping.  Many thoughts going through my head.  I had to relax.  I had to breath.  I was called in by a nurse so that I can sit with my wife through the procedure.  A crew of body engineers worked on retrieving my baby from danger.  Before I could blink a short cry came from behind the blue curtain.  A hand  appeared around the curtain holding my daughter.  "It's a girl" the doctor said.

The doctor handed my daughter to the respiratory squad.  They made sure that she was breathing and cleaned her up.  I was called over to the area where she was.  This little life form moving around on the table wondering where the heck she was.  I stared  in curiousity.  I was stunned.  Her beautiful eyes stared at me.
"You can touch her you know."  A nurse from behind me said smiling.
She swaddled my little baby and put her into my arms.

I heard my wife call my name.  "Is she alright?" She yelled across the operating floor.
I smiled.
"She is just fine." I replied.

I carried my new little sweetheart to her mommy.  My wife was worried because there were no cries.  Our daughter was just serene taking in her new environment.  Mommy smiled weakly.  I introduced the two of them to each other.  My heart was filled with joy.  I just loved my wife so much for being so strong.  I loved my little girl just because.  I couldn't really explain it.

I had always known that I would be a dad one day.  It was never a decision that I feared.  There were only questions I asked myself about the challenge.  Will I be as good of a father as my father was for his family? Will I be able to support my family as well as my father did?  There were hard times indeed but my parents pulled us through.  My mom had the role of keeping us close.  My father had the role of bread winner.  I wanted to make sure that I could answer those questions and work hard for my own family.

Being a dad is a little surreal at times.  I see my little girl playing and I just pause in awe of how much she has grown.  It only has been a year but I can't fully imagine my life with out her or even my life before her.  She is in day care now and socializing.  She learns so fast and is still as cute as a button.  I can't wait for the new experiences that parent hood has in store for me and my wife.  Life is just as interesting as it could ever be.

What else will 2014 have in store for me.  I really don't know.  Come back and check in on this blog as I will continue to write the things in my head at 2am.  If you are a more visual person check out my youtube page at www.youtube.com/brepublic.

I hope you have a great day!~  Let me know what you think of my blog!

Cheers!